26 tips for a happy marriage -- WORKS! (Updated!)

A lot of people have asked how My Boyfriend and I have been so happy and have such a good marriage.  This Chick thought I would try to simplify my answer with a few "tips".  Not that this is ALL, or that it is fool-proof (it takes two to tango), but if you both work toward these you will always consider your spouse your "boyfriend" or "girlfriend".

Here they are (and not in any particular order of importance):

[UPDATED!  I started with 10 tips, then it slowly worked up to 25...uh, I mean 26....]

1.  Realize that your spouse has had a "life" before you came along.  Don't try to force them into your mold.

2.  Talk.  And talk some more.  And talk again some more.  Don't stop talking to each other.  Turn off the dang TV and talk.

3.  Laugh.  Try to find things to laugh about.  Have a sense of humor about your relationship.  You are both fallible people (although one of you might think you are perfect and the other should be, too), but even laugh at that.  Don't take things too seriously.

4.  Talk about what attracted you both to each other in the first place.  Smile about that.  Realize your spouse hasn't changed -- you probably have.

5.  If you have a problem with one of your spouse's attitudes, don't nag the dude (chick).  Instead, pray about it.  God can talk to your spouse better than you can.  And, He can do a better job at changing them.  Or, maybe He'll change you, too.

6.  Don't embarrass your spouse in front of someone -- anyone.  Don't correct them in public, don't make them feel small in public, be gracious with them.  When you get home then you can tell your dude (chick) what you really feel.

7.  Fight fairly.  It's okay to fight.  Do not call each other names.  Do not make the person feel small.  Think of ways to say something that they could relate to. Don't "block them out", but listen to what they have to say even if you are steaming mad.  If you are a chick trying to relate to your dude, think of a way to relate it with a sports analogy.

8.  If you are a chick, compliment your dude about the way they mow the lawn.  They dig that.  You will see his self-esteem go through the roof.

9.  If you are a dude, compliment your chick for taking such good care of the kids.  Sometimes us chicks feel that that gets overlooked.  Also, don't say "What did YOU do all day?"  Once you are sole caregiver of kids, you will know...

10.  Have lots of money.  Just kidding.  But, find a way to not stress about the money.  If one person is better at handling the money, agree to let that person handle it.  If you have to have separate checking accounts, so be it.  Figure it out.  It's not worth affecting your marriage.

11.   Dudes -- come home from stinking work!  You are NOT married to your job, you are married to your WIFE.  Period.  You really are not as important as you think you are at your job, and when you leave they will only remember you for a short while.  Don't think so highly of yourselves.


12.  Go on dates.  Lots of dates.  They don't have to be expensive, or cost anything at all.  Walk together, hold hands, even when you may not feel like it.  Do some of the things you used to do when you were dating.

13.  Buy your chick flowers, dudes.  They may say that they really don't want flowers, but they really do.  All chicks dig flowers.  Plus, they are less fattening than candy.

14.  Find out your "love language" and talk about it.  Try to appeal to your dude (chick) according to their love language.  Click HERE to take a quiz to find out yours.  Then, read this book:  The 5 Love Languages: The Secret to Love That Lasts

15. Chicks, find SOMETHING to respect your husband about and tell him, even if you don't feel like it or don't think there is anything to respect him for.  Find SOMETHING.

16. Dudes, show your wife you love her-- even if you don't feel like it.

17. Cherish and respect the privacy of your relationship.

18.  Talk about your dude or chick as if they are the greatest thing on the face of the earth. Because they are.  Even if you don't think they are.  I think MINE is.

19.  Get  OFF the video games/computer!  Your spouse doesn't want to have to get on both you and the kids about this.

20  Do not ride in the car alone with another person of the opposite sex who is not your dude or chick.   Avoid ALL appearances of temptation or any opportunity of temptation, no matter how insignificant it might seem.  This would also apply being alone in the same room for any length of time.

21.  Put your spouse's feelings ahead of you.  This is hard to do, but if you both do that, it will work out good.  Don't be selfish.

22.   If you have to go to counseling, GO TO COUNSELING.  There is such a stigma about that -- especially with dudes.  It's NOT a big sweat-io.   Think of it as LEARNING how to communicate.  Done.

23.  Welcome and embrace the changes in your dude or chick's bod as they grow older.  They aren't going to look the way they did at 25.  Stay in shape, as much as possible, and it's most fun to go on walks or to the gym together.

24.  Be each other's best friend. 

25. Take a shower every day.  Chicks, do your hair.  Dudes, put deodorant on.  You'll all look better and smell better.

26.  And, last, but not least -- the biggy -- FORGIVE!  You ain't perfect either.

THE END

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How to touch up those pesky gray hairs when you don't have time to get out a box...WORKS!

OK, chickos.  This is for YOU.  I don't take any responsibility for the dudes that read this post and scoff.  We don't care about that, now, do we?

Chickos:  Have you ever planned and looked forward to a nice dinner out with the hubby, or a night with the chicks, and while getting ready you discover that those pesky grays in your temples are blaring out loud, "LOOK AT HOW OLD I AM!"   "Oh no!" you think to yourself.  "I don't have time to pull out that box of haircolor I had planned on applying to my scalp several days earlier but ran out of time!"  Please, ladies!  These things must not be!

NEVER FEAR!  I discovered a really swift way to save the day.  Get out your eyeshadow.  Hopefully, you are brunette, and hopefully you have a brown shade of eyecolor.  I am brunette and the shade I LOVE to use for this technique is Mary Kay's "Espresso."   S'nice.  I like it alot.  I bought it from my very good Mary Kay Lady -- Jay-9.  

Here's the trick.  Pull your hair back with a headband.  Get a nice brush (you can actually just use the foam one that comes with any old eyeshadow.  (With Mary Kay eyeshadow, you can actually wet it and it goes on even better.  Or, I apply it when my hair is still wet after getting out of the shower).

You can also apply this to your part, too, if you got some stray whites up there.

And, voila!  Your grays are camouflaged and you are back to your confident, groovin', chicky self!

Have fun tonight! (But, be sure not to leave home without your lipstick.)

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Airrosti Therapy -- WORKS! I love my Airrosti guy!

I LOVE my Airrosti guy!  And, no, I am not talking about My Boyfriend, and I do not love him like I love My Boyfriend.  Just to clarify.  But, my Airrosti guy has saved my health!

Ok, so you are asking what an Airrosti guy is.  He is a therapist who performs the Airrosti Rehab method.  Airrosti stands for:

Applied Integration for the Rapid Recovery of Soft Tissue Injuries and  is a treatment for both acute & chronic musculoskeletal injuries.

A quote from their website states:

Airrosti Stops Pain, So Pain Doesn't Stop You
Airrosti is a Best Practices Treatment Model designed to resolve many conditions in a very short amount of time. Most patients experience results after only one treatment—with 95% pain free range of motion achieved within 3 visits on average (based on past patient outcomes).

I have to tell you, that this is absolutely true!  I have suffered with hip pain, believing it to be bursitis, for several years.  It is debilitating, and one time could not even walk.  An Airrosti therapist came to our gym and was giving demonstrations on what it is.  I went to the website located the doc in my area -- Dr. Vachhani.  If you are in the Houston area, you need to go see him.  Am I glad I did!  After about 3 treatments, my hip was no longer in pain, and I was able to walk, run, and exercise like I had wanted to.  I do go back to him on occasion for follow ups, because my hip has a propensity for re-injury due to some scoliosis and knee displacement that I have (I know..I'm a mess), but once I'm done with my treatments I am able to get my groove on again.

 What the doctor does is manipulate the "fascia" , or connective tissue of the muscles.  Here is a quote from their website:

While it is important to assess and treat all aspects of the musculoskeletal system associated with any specific injury, one cannot ignore the role and importance of fascial tissue.

Why? Fascia, or connective tissue, has little to no blood supply and therefore its healing capabilities are limited. When you suffer an injury, the fascial tissue will remain distorted until manually corrected.

What is Fascia? Fascia is a thin sheet of connective tissue that:

• Covers everything from bones to muscles, organs, arteries, veins and nerves
• Provides a smooth, low friction environment for muscle contraction and relaxation
• Wraps around bony surfaces, creating an attachment surface for tendons and ligaments
• Holds the body's organs in place
• Transmits tension for vital movements from muscle to tendon to bone and from ligament to bone
• Creates a supportive and movable conduit for nerves, blood and lymph vessels as they pass through and between muscle

Airrosti Certified Providers are expertly trained to apply evidence-based manual therapy and active rehab exercises to correct these connective tissue distortions.

Here is a video of Gold Medalist Laura Wilkinson talking about her experience with Airrosti:









Here is a quote from someone else who can put this succinctly and better than I can (from http://www.yelp.com/biz/airrosti-rehab-centers-buda#hrid:Bo5Rz1C7U0U6d4x0SRM-wA)

Fascia is a tissue that surrounds everything in your body. It's a connective tissue that well, connects muscles and bones and such, and also supports and protects them. Fascia also helps move body fluids around. When an injury occurs -to a joint or muscle - the fascia gets affected as well. Unfortunately, the fascia has no blood supply, therefore has limited ability to heal itself.

Think of a ball of playdough. If someone came along and stuck their thumb in it and made a dimple, there is no way the playdough can reshape itself without manual intervention. So, what Airrosti does is "fasica release." They get in there and reshape the playdough. They do this with what feels like the deepest deep tissue massage you have ever felt. 

Click on this photos to find out what injuries Airrosti can impact:

WARNING:  Airrosti is NOT for the faint of heart.  It HURTS.   It is like a REAAALLLLY deep tissue massage, and I have him play some jazz music while he is treating me because it takes the edge off.  But, I tell you, the results are worth every part of the treatment.

So, if you have tried everything else, and nothing seems to work, try AIRROSTI.

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The ABSOLUTE BEST Cell Phone deal on the internet! - WORKS!

Ok -- I am totally serious!  Buying a phone this way is the BEST and it is the ONLY way that I will buy cell phones or service anymore.  I have bought my last three phones this way, and have never had issues, always great customer service!

Here it is:  AMAZON.COM!

Many of these phone you can get for $.01!  That's ONE CENT!  And, sometimes, you will even get a rebate that sends YOU money.  I have had BOTH.  





Like this Android phone from AT&T:





Or these Droid phones from Verizon Wireless:  



Or Blackberry from AT&T:



Or Windows Phone from T-Mobile:

These are just a few!

The rebates come from BOTH the phone carrier and Amazon, so you can get a great deal.  I got a Blackberry for $18, but if I had bought it the week before it would have been $.01.  I have also actually gotten money BACK -- I bought a phone and service and they sent me $24.95.  It's very cool, and I recommend it to all my friends!

It's a PLAN!

Service plans are the same as if you went to a cell phone store or online with the provider.  You can even add insurance, data plans, etc.  Just check the availability in your area.  Also, you can RENEW your contract and just get a new phone.  OR, get a totally new plan. 


Here are some other deals (as of today, February 23, 2011) and they change every few weeks, so be sure to check back...  Use this link or the ones above:

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How to get your teenage son to believe a clean room is AWESOME -- WORKS!

O.K.  I'm going to write it.  Hopefully my son won't see this or he will be MORTIFIED.  But, it happened when he was younger, so I guess that's okay.  Well, it happened when he was 13.  A couple of months ago.  But still...

Like most teenage boys, my wonderful son finds cleaning his room lacking awesomeness, so he chooses not to do it.  They do not want to do anything unless it has even a small amount of awesomeness.  I can try to convince his of the awesomeness that occurs to his brain when his eyes gaze opon the appearance of a clean room, but he will have nothing of it.  It does not compute.  I should be satisfied with that, and just close his door and turn away.  But NOOOOO -- this mom cannot do that.  The thought that maybe there could be a piece of cheese in the corner that these GIGANTAUR Texas cockroaches could dine on just gives me the heebies.

Well, it happened.  One day I was fed up.  The wonderful child had been asked several times to clean his room with the threat that he would not be able to attend a much anticipated party.  He went to the party, however, out of default because I failed to check his bedroom and had not followed up. Failure of the number one rule of training children.

The next morning, however, the room was still not cleaned, and my wonderful son got up and commenced to play video games.  Mind you, he had committed to let the neighbor's dog outside to go pee in the morning while they were out of town.  It was close to 10:00 in the morning.  I very STRONGLY suggested that he get his bee-hunker over to the neighbors house and let that dog out.  While he was gone, I took his video game controllers and marched upstairs.  On the way up, I grabbed some 30 gallon garbage bags.  I was on a mission. 

I started filling the bags with every thing that was not connected to the wall.  The bedding itself filled two of those bags.  In the process, my wonderful son shows up and asks, "What are you doing, mom?" (quite sheepishly, I might add).  I said, "I am cleaning your room, and you can pay me for it."  He said, incredulously, "How much?!" and I said, really without even realizing what I was saying, "$10 per bag!"    He then started to help me pick up and I calmly said, "You can leave now....I will do this."

When I was finished, I had myself a fine collection of large garbage bags.  I suggested to my wonderful son that he buy back his bedding first, which he very begrudgingly did.  He had to clean out each bag before being able to buy back the next one.  To him, this was the biggest FAIL he could imagine.  His beloved iPod was at the bottom of one of those bags -- I just didn't know which one.  He'd have to find that out for himself.

Fifty dollars poorer (of hard-earned money he was saving for a fancy camera), my wonderful son had his bags emptied, his bed made and his room cleaned.  And now, whenever I feel that the room is lacking in awesomeness, I ask him, "Would you like me to clean your room for you, son?"  For some reason, I never have had to again.

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Excellence Hair Color!!! Not! DOESN'T Work!

Yikes!  I picked up a box for my head the other day, thinking it was just another "tone" to try on my mane.  Boy, was I in for a BIG SURPRISE!

I thought I had used this product in the past, but I don't think so, or I would have remembered.  I'm not sure if anyone has experienced this with this product, but if you have, let me know!

All seemed great when I first applied it -- I liked that it had a nice little comb applicator you could use if you wanted, and it was very nice to apply -- no problems.  Even had enough to cover my whole head of hair -- and I have a lot of it (less than when I was younger, but that's a different story....)  And, I loved the color.  Covered my grays and reds quite nicely.

Anyway, the problem didn't arise until the 2nd day when they say you can wash your hair.  As I was trying to wash, I was finding that I wasn't able to get the feel of "squeaky clean".  It seemed that my hair was coated with Crisco.  But, I figured that that was the way it was supposed to feel until maybe the 2nd shampoo.  After drying my hair, I realized that it STILL didn't feel clean.  It felt like I still had a coating of Crisco in it, and it didn't shine.  So, I decided to wash it again.

After the 3rd wash (and that means the full "Wash, Rinse, Repeat" scenario), I realized that I was having major problems.  Hair STILL was GREASE BOMB.  I realized I needed to take some drastic measures.

So, I ran down to the store and bought me a bottle of a clarifying shampoo, believing this to do the trick.  Nope.  DOESN'T work.  Even after FOUR shampoos.  Then, later that day, I was asking myself, "What cuts through grease?" and I thought of Lemon Juice.  So I grabbed the bottle of lemon juice from the fridge and commenced to wash my hair again -- this also FOUR TIMES with the lemon juice.  Still -- DOESN'T work.  I am desperate!!!

So, I think again, "What can I use, what can I use???"  and it DAWNED on me -- Dawn Dish Detergent.  I figured if it was good enough for birds in an oil spill then it was good enough for me. 

Guess WHAT?  IT WORKED!  Woooo hoooo!  FINALLY, my hair was squeaky clean after just one wash with Dawn.  But, I "washed, rinsed, and repeated", just for good measure.  I was SO GLAD to finally find something that worked to get out the Crisco feeling from my hair.

So, to save you all the pain, I am sharing this with you.  DO NOT USE Excellence Creme by L'Oreal.  It will cause you much grief....even if you like the color.

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How to Get Skinny (WORKS!)

Don't put so much food in your pie hole.

The End.

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What WORKS: SKELETOR!

SCARE the grease off your pans!

Okay, so THIS is one of my most favorite things.  I call it "Skeletor".  My friend, Lynne, and I found it at Tuesday morning and were laughing our faces off, thinking we would buy them as a gag gifts for our friends.

Needless to say, it ended up on my kitchen counter.  And I've never had so much fun washing pots. 

Oh, and I have one in my shower.   That I use for my feet.  Makes that task a little more tolerable...

So, if you are going to have a kitchen or foot scrubber, find one that is fun...that way you might actually enjoy those pesky tasks.

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